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That's Your Fire

by Aloha

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1.
From space they say the world looks perfect, spinning smoky wisps just a hop away from happiness. From birth we take this for granted but say good-bye knowing we are one. Last night I dreamt you were lying beside me saying there is something past those clouds. The warmth that we've always dreamt of and the air that we live on. Rolling, rolling, rolling on the planet we were born on. So long!
2.
When I am far from you I begin to feel a pang The tension in and tension out. I'm longing like a fevered child. We should take a leap of faith on your bed and land as a pile of flesh. We'll stir the panic from out heads and drain it out of our limbs And when I dream of you, I roam around my room. I make you out of a brick wall, 'til a broken light proves my fall and then we take a leap of faith from your roof and land as a pile of flesh. Ferocious love we radiate, the spirit sings and the body shakes. So show me your mangled hand, so soft but you squeeze hard. You're soft but life's been hard . Please come help overcome. Wrap around me. Wrap yourself around me. You'll find, you have earned beautiful and that's invincible there marching by your side. n the fight of our lives we chase away the butterflies. We don't crack skulls but find a way to get inside. Who will catch the spirit? All of us, it's in the air tonight. When the fight is for our lives we'll be on top and will be all up inside.
3.
Don't Sleep 02:13
It must have been an angel. I don't mean that. But weren't those curtains flowing on our closed windows? There may be no reminders but I've known all along. Reciting conversations word for word with few elaborations. Not in language, not the inevitable, not the eye contact, but that was the sell. I have a photographic memory sometimes. I'll stay up for hours just in case you'd understand my crisis and so what if it's not a crisis at all. We have built an empire out of free time. And I'll sell you my labor, of course. It's mine.
4.
Liberty 04:34
So long. I feel a split coming on like a pipeline struck by an anchor, this vessel is gone. Into the lake, that mumbling sound is someone reading a diary aloud. So long. I feel a spell coming on. Someone pumps my heart without me until it bursts. This vessel is blown. Onto the floor, that mumbling sound is someone reading a diary aloud. What is the object I need to have drained from my head to keep dripping the fear onward into the sewer? Take the musty night out of my life? I get no perfume, get no flowers. I still get nervous. Don't joke about it. I want these things out loud. Liberty, I collapse for you. Pale man, caving in. On the street you saw him. Caved man, pale and falling.
5.
There, There 02:50
Nobody knows it like a person of the night. Because I see you sleeping. When something has fallen and no one will know for hours. I have fallen and you'll probably never know. I am like a criminal trying to get home safe to your affection. As when the storm blows trash into to streets, there is some good there. I feel your convulsions, are you holding or releasing, dear? These are the spasms and cries in your direction, like a pair of eyes that stare through to your backbone. There's enough money here for both of us. These are the good days. We are like criminals trying to get home safe to love like survival.
6.
Wood walls and neon signs and they are all elbows and eyes. How they speak makes sense to the sound of rain outside. They make it sound cheap, like mornings are all this fine. Sleeping through tears and slippery nights that soon will cake and dry. >From fast clouds to clear sky, no one's asking why though reflections and handprints I can still see for miles. I see couches I could sleep on and tell a hundred stories of fatherless friends and friendless fathers and those who'll notice that some can stay in, while some are left out, and somehow we all fall asleep tonight.
7.
Heading East 09:11
They cry at the sight of doubt's red eye Even the frail clench a fist eventually. And anyway, they beat it out of me. A dictator, etc... A gravedigger, etc... Walls crumble, do people rise with nothing but tommorrow in their eyes? Walls cumble, remain in piles basking in tomorrow's fear. After the rain sweeps the dust and dead wires I have to admit i am sometimes afraid. It's times like these that inspiration is locked down in a closet on a boat heading east. I'm having dreams I shouldn't share.
8.
I've got the gawks and I am picking up your quirks. Not another dead bird! You catch all but the gulls. There's enough oil here to slick back our stray hairs forever. Lorraine they say you grey is grace and your decay will wash away. Lorraine your rain has bleary eyes blinking for the skyline. Shelter is easy but its home you can't find. At least it takes time. I've got the fear and I am tugging at your sleeve. Not another dead word! You kill nonsense dead. There's enough sulk here to swallow the youngest tear in clouds forever. Never seen a shooting star mistaken for a meteor from the crowded erie shore there you were. I've got the shakes and I am praying for for your grace. Quickly before I move away! You're a karma bomb! There's not enough movement here to fuse rivers and divisions for a minute, lest forever. Lorraine, they call you here. You're supposed to see to it that the city makes its own stars, they catch fire. And there you are. There's hope in your shadows, dark only in the sickest ways. If we squint 'til the heavens are clear you'll be near. I come to you bearing plenty. All of it worthless probably. Can you take the worst from me? Can you take the fool out of me? Lorraine, I'd say you grey is grace and your nasty will vindicate.
9.
This is a mission to find out how you laid me out and washed me to your lair. Dank and sweet, candle-lit, enchanting. Those ghosts of yours make the softest noise. And I don't feel so strange. Can I ask you to what kind of world are you taking me? I'm up for anything. What kind of place is this that your keeping me? I'll take anything out on a limb I must say this is a blessing. The darkness won't hold you. That is the story I left with. The bluest blue came from the faucet. An orange bug crawled from the basement. And in a cloud of smoke, you were gorgeous.
10.
Sky High 03:30
When she stains your clothes you remember the night and walk a little slower towards the flow of her words. Losing balance. No one can keep themselves grounded when she casts spells from above and the cut of her dress rises. And when we're in the same place I feel her spirit all around. She's pulling my strings. How do you keep yourself so grounded, you see me sky high with no end in sight. I know tonight I am gone and all I want is time and to never hear goodnight. You keep yourself so grounded. Get yourself sky high. Breathe in, and breathe out. That's your fire.

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released May 16, 2000

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Aloha Cleveland, Ohio

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